You can’t imagine it, the singer remarks. At that moment preparing for her comeback record in nearly a decade, ecstatically in love with her recent boyfriend, and at long last the mom to a little one after struggling to conceive for ten years, feeling invincible. Then in March she was diagnosed with cancer in her breast.
The singer-songwriter, real name Jessica Cornish, is famous for telling it as it is. The record, the provocatively titled album, was supposed to be an transparent story, dealing with every moment of pain she’d endured since she last worked on songs (endometriosis, pregnancy loss, broken romances, gaslighting, mental health struggles) with her usual frankness. The initial release, the song No Secrets, was dropped in the spring. But by then there existed a huge secret. The cancer. Then follow-up track, her song Living My Best Life, debuted in May and she was giving interviews about how she was thriving, while at the same time dealing with her cancer. Four weeks after she shared the news, and in the start of summer she had a mastectomy.
She offers me her best “What the fuck?” glance. “I come out with a song called No Secrets. I’m giving every interview, and they’re, like, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I’m, like, ‘Uh, nothing really’” Cornish has just had to postpone shows because she’s still waiting for reconstructive surgery.
We meet at a photography studio in London. She is dressed in a beige fake-leather jacket, denim trousers with detailed white appliqués, off-white boots and large glasses. Imagine biker chic meets vintage look. “As if I’m in the seventies and I should have a partner with a mustache.” Like the film, I say, referencing the movie. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She beams. Jessie is quick, unfiltered and filter-free. She says she has always wanted to try comedy and is planning to attempt her standup debut soon. “I enjoy humor. During performances I frequently joke about the audience.”
Health Struggles and Diagnosis
Cornish was getting ready for an performance at the ceremony when she found a lump. “I quickly sought to get it examined, had an test, and they said, ‘It appears fine; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I was, like, ‘Yet I sense it. I’ve got an achy arm and tingling in my hands whenever I wake up.’ And they replied, ‘Well, let’s just do a biopsy?’ That was 28 March, the day after my birthday.” It was a Friday. The specialist told her if it was serious she’d call on the Monday. By then she had assured herself it was fine. The way she describes it, it was just bad timing to receive a diagnosis when she had many commitments.
“We’re two weeks away from launching this thing after eight years without an album and an extended break. And she contacted me and said, ‘Is six okay?’ And I assumed, ‘A video call, likely minor.’ So I log in thinking it’s all going to be fine, and she goes, ‘Are you sitting down?.’ The solemn tone? And she continues, ‘I regret to inform you but your reports have shown high-grade cancer cells.’” How did you respond? “I replied, ‘Well, that’s not great. That’s not fucking great timing.’ My initial thought was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”
I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself
She considered the operation scary and bizarre. “I dislike anesthesia. They lead you. In urgent cases you go on a gurney, but this time I just marched with a gown on and my rear exposed. It felt surreal.” But, she adds, she’s been blessed. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the surgery. “It’s terrible, but yet Thank fuck I found it early. The surgery happened a few months back and my one side now looks like a fruit under fabric.” Another grin. “The nipple was preserved.”
The follow-up procedure is therapeutic and aesthetic. Her breasts, she observes, are now “different sizes. The size doesn’t match. That’s impolite! I felt, no need to bully me, I’m already having a rough time. Such disrespect! It’s funny because I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got perfectionism, and I know they’d never be flawless. My plans were disrupted.”
Past Medical Issues
Cornish is familiar with health problems. She thinks her outlook on her diagnosis has been so upbeat because she’s used to physical challenges. Frequently they align with professional successes, acting as a reminder, or blow, to make her recall not to be complacent. “Truly, I feel fate says, ‘Enjoying yourself? Sit down.’ From a young age, it has consistently accompanied moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has affected my well-being.”
She takes me back to her childhood, already beginning performing in the West End in the production (she was selected at the age of nine). That’s when she was diagnosed with the cardiac issue Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a rapid pulse as well as vertigo and palpitations. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an IV drip, and being readmitted at night.” She skips forward six years, and 17-year-old Jess has entered the girl group Soul Deep while studying at the Brit School. “I just got my first record deal, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was planning to release songs in 2020 I had a car crash and my throat was injured and I was unable to vocalize for a long period.”
Hey, I say, slow down, I need a moment. At just 17? She nods|agrees
